This album fully portrays the feelings I’ve felt for this past year. The album starts with a calm, care-free mood, followed by worry and regret, only for that same worry and regret to be overcome. The title “Stargazer III” was chosen because of its similarity to the past two Stargazer albums. Following a year-long cycle of disrupted sleep, two or four hours of sleep per day, I suffered a serious nervous and mental breakdown, which was followed by depression and compulsive-obsessive thoughts. This is what I am trying to show through my album. Now, let us examine each composition separately.
1. Endless Possibilities – This is a portrayal of a carefree life, when you have no idea of what can happen and what is bad for you. You live outside of a schedule, with no plans; you improvise…
2. Nothing is static – It’s as if you’re one rigid body, living in a constantly changing world, but none of this affects you. You only observe.
3. Levitation – When my nervous episode began, I felt a sensation of levitation, as if I was leaving from my body and I felt myself somewhere above myself. This is what this music describes.
4. Midnight Jam – This reminds me of that carefree period of time when we would talk and play music at Sandri’s country house, as if you have old joys, despite the fact that you are levitating.
5. Sudden Fear – Everything is going well. You feel well, but despite this you contemplate on why everything can be going so well? And from here starts fear.
6. The Void - You suffer a panic attack during the fear. After this, emptiness takes hold in your mind. You can no longer tell where you are. You can no longer tell where you are, who you are, what you want.
7. Fullness in the Mind’s Eye–After this, you are exhausted and you start to hallucinate. You see unimaginable images; it’s as if your mind is mocking you. It’s overflowing.
8. Ascension–After a couple of days, it’s as if everything falls back into place and you spiritually ascend.
9. Marvelous Sadness – However, despite all of this, nothing makes you happy. Depression starts. You can no longer find common ground with any one. All your fields of interest start to disappear and you start to think about the meaning of your life.
10. Obsessions–While contemplating the meaning of your life, you start to wonder who you are in this infinity. What is infinity? These thoughts give you no rest. You think about the same thing every day.
11. Variations–Obsessions takes on many manifestations and portrays itself to you in different forms. For example, where does drinking water come from and where does it go? Money that was paid, air that was breathed…
12. Breathe–This is an obsession on breathing, on how you breathe involuntarily and how you go on to control it.
13. Overcome – After time, the obsessions subside and they are no longer as distressing, like how it was before.
14. Medication – You go onto medication and your mind calms down thanks to medicine.
15. Easy Dreams - At the peak of the nervous episode, I had horrible dreams. I would see nightmares, but the dreams also calmed down, after the medication and the passage of time, and now it is pleasant to see them.
16. Right Side – You understand that you’re going in the right direction. Neither depressions nor the obsessions trouble you anymore.
17. New Life–A new step in life starts. You are experienced now and you understand what may follow. You find new interests, you see your friends.
released July 30, 2016
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